Guys, I am not kidding when I tell you I get so bored and overwhelmed with dull-ness that Caleb will often get home from work to find me dismantling our couch and then rebuilding it but adding in a dog fort. Not kidding. This was a thing I did. Ahh, isn’t it fun being in a relationship with a creative??
The last 3-4 years of my life have been so solely focused on jobs and navigating the endless to-do lists that I pushed the fun albeit useless shit out of my brain. If it didn’t add to my career, this website, or to my bank account, it didn’t happen. I was letting life run me over like a train and I had no way of getting the fuck off the tracks. To be clear, I enjoyed a lot of what I was doing. One Broke Actress for example has always been such a source of joy for me…but I can’t lie and tell you that it didn’t add to the lists. I need to schedule a podcast, how can I remember to post to the Instagram, how in God’s name do I even find time to write?! And on and on. I had become so amped on doing things that “mattered” that I no longer did anything just for fucking fun.
Well the pandemic really held my toes to the fire of my own life choices. Now I had to come face to face with not only zero options of acting work but zero options of work-work. I had to fill days on end with things that I chose to do, perhaps something I have spent a lifetime avoiding. I now wish I had some of those first weeks back (isn’t that how it always works though) to use knowing that I can enjoy myself without feeling bad. That day’s weren’t made to be checked off, that the guilt of “doing nothing” could actually be a gentle rest and reset? Well, fine. Then I will tell you all now. Let’s romanticize the shit out of the rest of our life.
If you don’t know what I mean, let me ask you this. How did you eat your lunch today? I ate a lot of my recent lunches at my desk, while writing or trying to do something “productive” (as though this was a regulation of being a human), usually thrown together in a bowl, drinking out of my workout water bottle, and probably (definitely) forgetting to grab a napkin. BOO. How awful is it that I treat a day when I don’t have crazy back to back things to do with such little respect. Here is how I romanticized my lunch today. I walked out of my office. I made a salad with some leftover salmon +quinoa + greens + honey mustard dressing. I tossed it in a big bowl a-la restaurant style, and then I moved it to a lovely porcelain wide brimmed bowl. I pulled about two big hunks of fresh pita bread too. I poured a Strawberry Spindrift into a wine glass full of ice. I picked out my favorite fork (please tell me you have a favorite fork), I got a real napkin, and I took it all to my patio. Did I bring my iPad to watch more Ramy on Hulu? Sure. Were my dogs all over me? Always. Did I enjoy the fuck outta the meal? YES. This is romanticizing your life.
This is taking the time to do small things for no reason other than they make you happy for a half second. And listen, this is a life time effort. It’s not always pretty and you won’t always have time. But what if you took it when you got the chance? These type of moments actually inspire the shit out of me. They calm in a weird way. I am not saying your life should be an IG moment waiting to happen. In fact I didn’t even post my cute patio lunch because I totally forget about my phone for 25 minutes.
Ok here are some more simple AF ways to do this
Take a shower and then take the time to out on all your lotions and stuff. Slow. Maybe in a robe like you’re at a hotel. Actually take the time to feel it.
Before your next online acting class or long commute to a side job you still have, take a second to remember back when you were a kid and wanted to life the grown up life and be an actor. Write down a couple of things you looked forward to (even if it was just having your own room). You’re literately probably living at least one of your childhood dreams and this can open up some really fun doors!
Paint your nails or toes even though no one is going to see them but you during your morning yoga. Paint them a color that makes you feel good. Speaking of…
Bake a cake and eat it yourself. Not in a binge-y way and not with any caloric guilt attached. If you literally taste it I almost guarantee you won’t want the whole thing. And if you do, fuck it. Eat the damn cake. You made it. Not a cake person? Make a badass martini. But do it up.
Trade a sweaty at home workout for a 45 min walk down a street you usually don’t walk on.
Pour yourself a glass of water with ice. Put a lemon slice and a straw in it. Make it look like a restaurant would serve it. I suggest doing this with any meal you want. There is a reason plating and atmosphere are so important in that business.
Buy yourself a $5 bouquet of flowers from Trader Joe’s. It will look ugly, but you can fix it. Take it home and separate the flowers, rearrange them, toss the ones that don’t work. Put them by your desk or bed. Yes you heard it here, I have bought my own flowers pretty much all my life.
Now get the hell out of here and go romanticize your LIFE.